Dear Turban,
Welcome back.
Just like your owner, you’ve returned to your creator. Your assignment is done. You’ve been a stylish fighter against the coldness of sterile environments. You’ve been a master of disguise, embracing baldness as a synonym of pursuit. The pursuit of health, happiness, life. You were a trusted consigliere, battling against rashes and discolorations. With your perky updo, you fought fatigue, while your interior’s gentle touch helped to brave ever-increasing pain.
So even though now you are just a useless heap of fabric, thank you for all your hard work, you deserved this (way too) early retirement.
Welcome back.
Yours truly.